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Beauty / Claire Blackmore

41 Thoughts You have When Getting A Wax *Down There*

Big bush or super-smooth – how do you like yours? Regardless if you whip off your pubes or let them grow, if you’ve ever had a fanny wax you can totally relate…

1. Sooo. Do I keep my knickers on or off?

2. *waxer says off*

3. Okaaay.

4. She’s going to touch my vag and I can’t even remember her name.

5. What the hell is her name?

6. Gah, I’m so hairy.

7. When did I last get this done?

8. It must be months. It’s like a jungle down there.

9. I wish I’d at least trimmed it first.

10. *waxer says there’s hardly any hair*

11. WTF?

12. Maybe I’m not that hairy after all.

13. How hairy, is hairy anyway?

14. Who knows?

15. Who cares?

16. I clearly care, or why am I parting with my hard earned cash to get it waxed off.

17. Maybe I should’ve just left it…

18. I can deal with a muff, but hair snaking down my inner thighs? No ta.

19. Why does it grow there anyway?

20. I’m sweating.

21. It’s a million degrees in here.

22. I should’ve taken a painkiller.

23. Or two.

24. Ouch. Jeez.

25. This is torture.

26. Please do it fast. Please do it fast.

27. That was my flap. Frickin’ OUCH lady!

28. PAIN MAKES ME ANGRY.

29. It’s not her fault. She’s doing her job. Try not to yelp/scream/shout.

30. Why oh why am I putting myself through this?

31. Pubes are weird.

32. Leave me a landing strip, love. I don’t want it all off.

33. Tweezering? Cool. That’s above and beyond.

34. Oh hey vagina. I can see you again.

35. Now time for the bum crack. Gulp.

36. How do you want me?

37. Bum in the air, cheeks parted? Classy.

38. Can she see my bum hole?

39. Probably.

40. This girl doesn’t get paid enough.

41. I miss my bush.

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